Wednesday, February 3, 2010

Dear Anonymous,

You wrote to me:

"Now if you could get rid of those ugly pacifiers. Why do they use the baby ones,"

Mind you, I copied & pasted this so as you can see, your punctuation is wrong. Shouldn't that comma be a question mark? Jack ass. Make that a dumb jack ass.

I normally don't write a comment back to people like this but I think I want to make you feel like shit. You see, as a preemie, sucking is the most important movement of muscles that is required outside of the basics. If they can't suck, swallow, & breathe all at the same time, they can't take a bottle.

In the NICU, the Soothies were given to them, to practice sucking. To be able to eat. From a parental perspective, that sucking became music to my ears. To this day, it brings me just as much comfort as it does my girls. Hell, I don't even think they look funny w/ them.

Yes, they have them when ever they want. Yes, it is a security item for them. Yes, I know we will eventually have to take them away. Yes, it will be hard.

BUT, it is a battle we have chosen not to fight at the moment. There are much more important things on our plate such as keeping our kids illness free due to all the suffering our family endured when we almost lost our little boy last year.

To leave such an ignorant comment, without having the balls to even put your name just shows me & the rest of the world how much of a coward you are. You must not have children b/c I use to think pacifiers were ugly too, that was before I had my 3 beautiful babies.

And with that, I leave this blog open for the world to see & hope they don't pass judgment on you as you passed judgment on my children.

Sincerely,
Astrid & the pacifier sucking children (Sofia & Gabriella)

35 comments:

happygal said...

Good for you Astrid.

Susan said...

I can't believe someone left a comment like that! I'm glad you called out the jackass! If the girls are happy with their pacis, let it be.

Samantha said...

Astrid, you know people post what they want in the cyberworld without thinking. Try not to take it personally. Actually, I wouldn't find that comment bad. They obviously don't know anything about preemies.

When my trips were home, they couldn't even use a pacy as it kept falling out. Their suck reflex didn't seem to work on pacifiers, but did on bottles! Weird, they have never used them and sometimes I wish they did, especially when they are cranky ;)

Kim aka Gage's mommy said...

Good for you Astrid! People are so quick to pass judgement without even considering the situation. Not to mention each family is different and so are their childrens needs. Gage still takes his paci and it is a security thing for him. I could care less what other people think about that because it works for us right now also. Eventually our babies will give them up and until then as long as their mommies think they are super cute with them then thats all that matters.

Shosh said...

what a jerk. i dont understand why people leave rude comments. why do they care if your kids have pacifiers anyway?

Asher & Noah's Mommy said...

People are so damn ignorant and it just blows my mind!! UGH!!! First of all, why does this JACK ASS care if your kids have pacis, and secondly, is it really worth leaving a dumb ass comment? Really, people need to get a life. Astrid, I love you girl, and you are an awesome Mama =)

mpannek said...

LOL! Mine still have their pacis and I have no plans to give them up anytime soon!!! Mine were not even preemies, so we must be REALLY ugly at my house. :) Creep.

Christina said...

People need to mind their own business.

Renee Hall said...

Mine are 2.5 and we still let each one have there lovie (whatever it maybe) and 1 does choose a pacifier. When sickness strikes, you are 100% correct, sometimes that is all they have, and for that reason alone we continue to endure them. Kuddos to you for jumping back at them.

Cody's Mom said...

Now I have heard everything. An ugly pacifier. Anonymous, you are definitely not a mother or you would never have even thought to write something so incredibly stupid to the mother of preemie triplets, one of whom has been through hell. An ugly pacifier. Maybe you, Anonymous, should go buy a beautiful pacifier and then go suck it. You obviously need some soothing.

Anonymous said...

I am a mother of a preemie who used a pacifier until she was 1 but at the age of six months only used it in her crib at nap time and bedtime. How do you hear your children talk since they always have those things in their mouths. Good luck with the dentist bills.

Jocelyn - the twins momma said...

Again, no balls to make the comment under an actual identity .. just goes to show!! Your children are BEAUTIFUL, Astrid, WITH or WITHOUT pacifiers in their mouths. It's truly a sad day when ignorant people like "anonymous" feel their opinions truly matter.

Emily said...

Awww, Anonymous has a case of "lastworditis". If youre going to make comments, at least have the guts to show your face... Go pound sand... Who are you to judge another parent- especially on something as benign and harmless as pacifier use in a 21 month old BABY. You may have your one preemie child, but that is no ruler to dealing with three, let alone a family dealing with three after one suffered a severe illness not long ago. Astrid has more than enough on her plate, and paci weaning isnt even appropriate at this stage, in THIS situation. And it certainly isnt the focus of this very dedicated and supportive mother at this point to break a soothing behavior. Besides, Im sure the girls wont go off to college with pacifiers, speech problems or bad teeth for that matter.

Erin said...

Wowzers! The nerve of some people! Or should I say some person? It sounds like someone is really having a hard time with their life to come and bad-mouth other people's parenting choices. I am sorry you have to deal with rude and silly comments, Astrid. Nobody understands what go through each day with THREE children all the same age. I think it is time for Anonymous to move on with her life and stop criticizing others.

Norina said...

Dear Anonymous,
You're an asshole.

Dear Astrid,
You rock!

Anonymous said...

They're just doing it to get a rise out of you. People seem to do it on every blog that I follow - I think it amuses them!
Merran in Australia...(just so you know I'm not the anonymous one!)

Surviving Triplets said...

Merran, thank you, haha! I do know they are trying to get a rise out of me. This time it struck a cord. Most times, I blow it off. I expect the comments though. I have a public blog so I do know it will come around. Thank you all for your SUPPORTIVE & KIND words!

Kaplanovs said...

Dear Astrid!

How unfortunate that mothers (or fathers, possibly) feel the need to be so judgmental about how to best raise kids. How hurtful comments like that can be!

I'm sure you are well aware of the possible downsides of using pacifiers, and you have made that decision for yourself and your kids. It is hardly appropriate for your blog readers to inform you of how you should be raising your children, or how you are doing it wrong.

I enjoy reading your blog, paci's or not!

Les Kaplanovs

Anonymous said...

Yo, anonymous troll, I got a paci for ya! Vinnie, from Cleveland.

Prather Family said...

Wow, the nerve of some people. My girls don't take their paci's anymore and there are times when I wish they did so they could soothe themselves.

Anonymous ~ As for the dental issues. That is not going to cause problems with Primary teeth. Do some research on dental issues before you make ignorant comments. (I work in the dental field, I should know).

Astrid you are a great mother and good for you for taking a stand!

Mom, Wife, Nina said...

Astrid, my daughter had FIVE pacifiers until she was 3! She wanted 1 for her mouth, 2 for her hands, 1 she would bite the tip off to stick on her nose and 1 "for emergencies". I kid you not! I let her keep them until SHE was ready to let go, which she did, on her own terms. Perfect speech and perfect teeth. There is NOTHING wrong with a little one needing/wanting a pacifier. Just ignore the ignorant person trying to get under your skin. Not worth it. :)

Amber said...

Wow some people! As far as anonymous, my daughter is 26 months and just gave up her paci for the most part. She use to suck on it as much as she wanted! She has been to the dentist and he has NO CONCERNS with her teeth.

Astrid- Don't let this get to you! You are a wonderful mommy and I love following you and your beautiful kiddos, pacis and all!!

Rebecca said...

Astrid, I love how you came back full throttle. I thought my triplets would never get the pacifier thing down. Now I can't take it away from them...to give them their bottles! :) YOU ROCK! And you are an incredible support to me. I don't think I could hold onto any level of sanity without reading your posts.
Take care. Hope I can get to the next NWHMOM meeting. Becca Gutierrez.

Laura Rucker said...

Okay I am chiming in too. I have 4 kids Mr/Mrs. Anonymous and 2 of them are Twins who were also a month early! All 4 have had pacifiers and my 20 month old twins still have thme. Are we weaning them No!! I love the fact that they go to sleep at night so nicely with out a sound and then when I check on them they have spit them out. No big deal. My first 2 had them until they were over 2 and no dental problems. They talk fine no speech issues. Gosh you must be one of those people who have to make yourself feel good by trying to make others feel like their parenting skills are up to Par. I know your type...Your the one with the "Perfect child" I bet. Gosh Try having multiples and more. My daughter will take it out to say her words and then puts it back in no big deal she communicates just fine. So to you anonymous person STUFF IT!! Astrid keep them as long as you want. There is no right time to take them away. Do what you want sure people will have their 2 cents they always do but who cares about them. Keep up the good work!!

ashleylove said...

I have 3 boys who were all FULL TERM. The older two used their "binkies" until they were 2-2.5 and the baby, who is 13 months, still uses his. No dental problems, no speech problems. Anonymous, get over yourself.

Kayla said...

Astrid, so sorry you have had to deal with someone so inconsiderate and stupid. My Isabella still has her paci with no signs of giving it up anytime soon! Love ya girl!

Addie (baner) said...

Hey Astrid, it is Addie :)

Just had to support you in this fight, my kids, 2.5 and 18 months, and they both still have their pacis! It is a huge comfort! So you just go on with your bad self Astrid and do what you know is right for YOUR KIDS!!

As for dentist bills one mentioned...umm last time I checked these were all still baby teeth...but whatev!! HA!

BethE said...

My baby was a preemie (27 weeks when she was born) and has used a paci since then. I was ALWAYS one who said I'd NEVER use a paci, but she does use it and I'm FINE with it.

And as for dentists... my dentist said he's never seen such straight and beautiful teeth as my little girl's. Yeah... that one that still at the age of 3.5 uses a paci.

Brittanie said...

Erin used her paci until SHE gave it up at 21 months (I thought she'd need it more after Patrick was born, the last day she took it was the day I was in the hospital away from her having her brother). I don't think it's a problem in children this young. ESPECIALLY when you've got bigger fights to fight, it's just not worth taking the energy from those fights to conquer the paci issue.

And I think that they're cute with them. So there.

Kelie Scott said...

I just came across your blog and i am so glad i did while this was the top post. I say "GO MOM" you are awesome I love that just because one person made a rude comment toward your family that you are not freaking out and going private. I commend you on this and also on letting your children be little as long as they want. You deserve mother of the year. your children are beautiful enjoy them as long as you can.

Kelly said...

Too bad some adults don't use pacis to keep themselves quiet.

I'm glad "anonymous" is living her life so perfectly that she feels that it is appropriate to come on someone else's blog to criticize something so petty and completely off topic. How arrogant!

OMG Triplets said...

The "Anonymous pacifier patrol dumb ass" has struck my blog before too. Gotta love it : ) Great post! Love your blog!

HRHSpence said...

Astrid,

We love your babies; don't let trolls get you in a bad mood. They're not worth the aggravation.

Seanaci said...

Oy! Ya know...my doctor always told my mom when we were little it didn't matter when she took the paci's away. It's not like we were going to start school with them. It doesn't matter that they still have them. And you're parenting your children the way YOU want to. And that's all that matters. Spit on people like Anony who posted that comment. :(

The Luchettas said...

Good for you Astrid! I find it funny that so many people in the world feel that they have the "right" to give their opinion on situations that they know nothing about. How dare she even feel that it's okay to share her ignorant thoughts about someone other than herself and her own situation. And that's exactly what you have to blame it on...IGNORANCE! I love that you said something back to her. Thank you for not backing down and bringing out her stupidity for the world to see!